So here are my answers to The Fabulously Gay Survey.
1. How Old Were You When You Knew You Weren't Straight?
I was 16 years old when I first realized that I was different and not straight. I've always just been "me". It wasn't until I was 16 and taking a class to be a peer counselor that the topic of sexuality came up and at that point, I began to question mine. That maybe I wasn't straight. Not that I was gay, but that maybe I wasn't straight.
2. Have You Ever Had Sex With The Opposite Sex?
I guess it all depends on your definition of "sex". Not to pull a Bill Clinton on everyone, so here's my definition of sex is "any physical contact involving genitals or breasts for the purpose of sexually excitement". So in my case, yes, I have had sex with the opposite sex. I was at a sex party to celebrate the equinox or solstice and it was pretty boring. There were a lot of people and no one that I knew. There were men and women, of all colors and shapes. It was very new agey. I had explored all over and finally after several attempts with guys I thought were hot, ended up on the mattress. I was soon joined by other people on the mattress. Our group kept growing and growing, till there were about seven of us, all Asian. We ended up just chatting and finding that we were all having problems "hooking up". How interesting huh? One thing led to another. Our conversations led to touches, which led to kissing and more. Yes, we were a steaming mass of legs, arms and mouths and we were freaking HOT!
So, to answer the question, I ended up kissing both of the Asian lesbians in this puppy pile (a lesbian term I picked up recently) on the lips and made love to their breasts and nipples. Although I spent most of my time there comparing them to a guy's flatter and more dense version :)
3. Who Is The First Person You Came Out To?
That distinction would have to be my best friend at the time, Kevin. I would later serve as his groom's man at his wedding. I first came out as bisexual and then later as gay.
4. Are You Out To Your Parents?
Yes, I am. It took a bit of work to do so though. My family never talked about anything that had to do with sex (not unusual it seems in most families) and when I moved back home, I realized that I didn't want to go back into the closet. That I enjoyed the freedom to be "me", all of "me". So I tried to bring up the subject several times without any success. I finally decided to bring in outsiders, knowing that my parents will not be able to withstand the gossip. I participated in Gay Pride and marched. My parents and I had a very spirited conversation two days later when I finally came back home.
5. Do You Want Children?
Yes, I do. I am not sure if they have to be mine biologically or not. I waver on this issue, but I do know that I want to have kids.
6. Do You Have More Gay Friends or Straight Friends?
I have more gay friends compared to straight friends. This is due to the places I frequent. I grew up in San Francisco, so I bump into my straight friends all the time around town. It's become a joke among my friends, that no matter where I go, I will bump into someone I know. It's not true, but more often than not, I have bumped into friends no matter where I have been.
7. Were You Out in School?
In high school, no. I came out during college. Once I came out to myself, I came out at school shortly after. I joined the GALA (Gay and Lesbian Association) at school. I was also very active in HIV prevention and was very out in my class presentations.
8. Is Your Best Friend The Same Sex As You
Yes, they are :)
9. If Your Best Friend Is The Same Sex, have you ever had sex with them?
I have had sex with some of my best friends, but not all of them.
10. Have you ever done crystal meth?
Yes, I have. It's not my proudest moment, but I have used meth in the past and for a time, was using quite a bit of it. It was mostly weekend stuff, but some weekends, I was high the whole time. It's enough to say that I was addicted to the stuff. I have been clean for two years now and although I still get the "urge" to use again, I clamp down on it really hard and don't give in.
11. Have You Ever Been In A Sling?
Yes, I have, but only to sit in one. I have never done anything while I was in the sling, which is the real question.
12. Have You Ever Done A 3-way?
Yes, in fact, many times. I actually prefered group sex, starting with as few as three people to more over one-on-one for a while in my life. It would give me immense pleasure to start an orgy in a public space (usually a sex club).
13. Have You Ever Dressed In Drag?
Yes, I have. I have also preformed on stage in drag and entered a drag contest (didn't win) and was photographed with B.D. Wong (actor) while I was in drag.
13a. Would you date a Drag queen?
Yes, my second boyfriend was a drag queen and was really helpful by giving me tips and assistance when I was first doing drag.
14. Are You A Top/Bottom or truly Versatile?
I'm truly versatile. I enjoy being a top and bottom equally and can't restrict myself to just doing one activity. How boring is THAT!
15. Have You Seen An Uncircumsized Penis?
Uh, duh, everytime I'm standing naked in front of a mirror.
16. Have You Had Sex With Someone of A Different Race?
Of course. There are way too many to list.
17. Have You Ever Barebacked?
Yes, I have. For several reasons, like it was the first time I ever had sex, and I was really stupid.
18. How Many Cher CDs do you own?
I'm kinda shocked to say that I don't have any of her albums. I do have a CD single though. Does that count?
19. Name Of Your First True Love?
My second boyfriend, Rafael. He was the first person I fell in love with. He is also the first person to break my heart.
20. Do You Still Talk To them?
Yes. Well, make that sometimes. He called me up out of the blue and asked me to dinner. He wanted to get back together with me and I turned him down. Part of me wanted to still be with him, but my heart couldn't take being broken again.
21. Does Size Matter?
Of course it does. The size of the heart is critical in a relationship. If you're talking about dick size, you better believe it! Hahahahaha, ok, not really. Dick size doesn't really matter, as long as there's enough to work with and the guy knows how to use it to full effect. Remember that old saying? "It's not the size of the boat, it's the motion of the ocean" Yeah baby :)
22. Biggest Turn On?
Warm eyes and a great smile. You can't fake either and the two together is damn sexy!
23. Biggest Turn Off?
A bad attitude. Second biggest turn off is flakeyness.
24. Ever Been Harrassed Because You Are Gay?
Yeah, but it wasn't a big thing. I've had people say shit like "Fucking Fags" to me. The lamest ones are those that scream it out as they ride by in their cars. The ones saying it to me in my face are braver.
25. Worst Gay Sterotype That Applies To You?
I have soooooo many. I love fashion. I did floral arrangment. I bake. I love to redecorate. I can dance. The worst though is that I have a fag hag. Cuz, you can't be a fag, unless you have a fag hag. It's like one creates the other.
26. Ever Been To A Pride Rally?
Oh yeah! I try to go to everyone. I also marched many times in the parade when I can. One year I marched twice. The first time around i was holding the parade banner at the very front. After reaching the end of the parade route, I ran back and marched again with the Asian contingent.
27. Would You Marry If You Could?
If I could, I would. I find that I'm very conventional on this issue.
28. Would you rather be rich and smart or young and beautiful?
I would rather be rich and smart, because the youth get old and the beautiful grow ugly. If I was rich and smart, I can create the fountain of youth and have plastic surgery.
29. Do You Sculpt Your Eyebrows?
Only when I do real girl drag, otherwise, no. It's all natural baby.
30. Do You Trim Your Body?
I take it that this question is asking about body hair. I don't have any body hair to speak of. Part of being a stereotypical Asian and having an almost hairless body.
31. Ever had sex with more than one person in a day?
Hahahahaha, yeah. At one point I had to get a 24hr planner to schedule my day. I've also had sex with more than one person at a time, either in an orgy situation or one after another at a sex party (I was being very piggy) *oink*
32. Ever been to an orgy?
Oh yeah, many times. I love them orgies and when possible, would start one.
33. Have you dated your best friends ex?
I had sex with my best friend's ex, does that count? Otherwise no. One of the best things about my best friends, is that we all have different tastes in men. Although there are some guys that we have all had.
34. Would you vote for Hillary Clinton if she ran for president?
That would depend on what her position is on topics that matter to me at the time. She doesn't get an automatic vote from me here.
35. Do you want monogamy in your relationships?
Yes, I do now.
36. Do you believe in true love?
37. Do you have any tattoos?
Yes, one on my back.
38. Do you have any piercings?
Yes, I've had my nipples and ear lobes pierced. The right ear lobe one closed up when I had to take them off for an x-ray and they've never opened up. The right nipple never really healed, so I had that one taken out.
39. Would you date a smoker?
I have in the past... my second boyfriend. The only reason I stayed with him, was that I was in love with him. Otherwise, no, i would not date a smoker. I'm very sensitive to smells and I can't stand the smell of cigars or cigs.
40. Do you know anyone who has died from H.I.V.?
Yes, too many. Their memories are what sustains me sometimes when things look darkest for me. They also provide me with inspiration to be who I am meant to be in life.
41. Do you know what Stonewall was?
Yes, I was also in NYC to celebrate the Stonewall 25th anniversary. It was the biggest freaking rainbow flag I've ever seen.
42. Wonder Woman, Xena or The Halliwell Sisters?
I'm old school, Wonder Woman. She's lasted the longest and I used to pretend I was her and spin around and around. Yes, I did sometimes hurt myself after getting really dizzy :)
44. Strangest place you have had sex?
This is a hard one. I'll list a few, because I really can't say which is the strangest.
- Moving auto over the Golden Gate Bridge (San Francisco)
- In public during the day in front of strangers (San Francisco)
- Outdoor hot tub in a condo complex (San Francisco)
- Kitchen counter for a sex video shoot (Orange County)
- Night club bathroom stall (Hong Kong)
- Restaurant bathroom (San Francisco)
- Picnic bench in Golden Gate Park during the day (San Francisco)
- Night club couch (San Francisco)
- Flower shop (Hong Kong)
- In my bed, (Various locations LOL)
45. Strangest place you've woken up?
Hong Kong. I went home with a guy that picked me up at the club. I woke up to the sounds of people talking...many people talking. I didn't recognize the place or the voices. When I heard a females voice, I decided to leave. After I got dressed and left the room, I saw three people, two guys (the one I came back with another) and a girl. They tried to get me to stay, but it was just too weird and I left. I got the feeling that they wanted to do a group thing, but when you add in a girl, it got too weird for me. I wasn't comfortable enough with my sexuality to do anything with girls back then.
46. Are your best years behind or in front of you?
They're still in front of me :)
47. Favorite porn movie?
I don't really watch porn, so can't say I have a favorite.
48. Are you in love now?
Yes, very much so.
49. Ever been in love with a straight guy/girl?
Nope. All the guys I've fallen in love with have been gay and I've never fallen in love with a girl.
50. Did you ever have sex with them?
I have had sex with straight guys before. They later turn out to be gay. I don't know if they were already gay to begin with or if I had something to do with it. I would like to think that I was so good that I turned them gay, but who knows :)
51. Have you ever been to a nude beach?
Oh yeah, San Francisco has several.
52. Have you ever been to a bath house?
Yup. A few here in the San Francisco Bay Area and down in Los Angeles. I've also been to saunas in Hong Kong and in Bankok.
53. Ever had sex in public?
Oh yeah. Although, not as much as I'd like ;)
Not at bad survey and it actually let me relive some of my memories and post something to my blog. A win-win situation for me :)
What's a memory?
Fleeting moments of our lives.